geniebrownjoslin

Retiring Couples Counseling

Thu, 16 Oct 2025 04:28:50 GMT

Are you and your significant other struggling with retirement?

Retired couples often acknowledge the big change retirement brings is that they have more time to spend with each other. Adjusting to retirement, however, can often be different from what they expected and can even have an unexpected impact on their relationship. It can be difficult to adjust to a new situation. The changes can build up frustration, dissatisfaction, and even disappointment.

Communication is extremely important in order to navigate these struggles. Listening and being heard can help resolve the stress in the relationship. I can help you learn effective communication skils about feelings, expectations, and resolutions.

Whether you've already retired or it's on the horizon I believe my skills can help you make this transition a positive experience.

Houston Strong After Harvey

Mon, 01 Sep 2025 04:33:13 GMT

I know that l am experiencing PHSD, post traumatic Harvey disorder. I think most people in the broader Houston area are having stress reactions. I want to share a message that my friend wrote. It replaces images of destruction with images of humanity.

A few weeks ago, a hurricane named, jauntily enough, Harvey, hit the Gulf Coast and it rained and rained, the waters rose and rose, to biblical depths.

Tens of thousands of folks found themselves flooded out of their homes, sometimes stranded on their roofs or on the tops of their of cars, or wading through chest-deep water to get to high ground.

During those frightening days, thousands of other folks got in their boats to go rescue flood victims, brought supplies to shelters, helped muck out houses when the water receded….

And no one asked, before pulling a grandmother into a boat, or handing out diapers and bottled water “What political party are you affiliated with?” “What is your gender or sexual orientation?” “Are you in this country illegally?” “Who did you vote for?” “What is your religion?” …..

They asked “How can I help?”

Let's reflect on our capacity to look beyond differences and recognize our common humanity in times of crisis - and our impulse to magnify and focus on those differences when the storm has passed.”

Gratitude in Life and Relationships

Tue, 10 Jun 2025 04:31:38 GMT

Around the holidays we think of what we are grateful for including the people in life. For some reason, it is easier to think of what’s going wrong. Picking just one thing you are grateful for each day helps create a positive. It pulls us out the victim role and into an adult place of appreciation. I ask my clients to exchange something they appreciate about each other every day. Sit down, face to face, and focus only on each other. This will only take 5 minutes or less and can turn around the way you think about your relationship for the whole day. Expressing gratitude and gratefulness reduces stress, aches and pain, and improves sleep. There is a wealth of scientific research on this. Try it. You have nothing to lose.

The Peak - End Rule

Sat, 01 Jul 2017 04:35:33 GMT

THE PEAK - END RULE, from Psychology Today, July 2017

“Memory is a tricky thing; it does not record events exactly as they unfold. Instead, people engage in an array of energy-sparing mental shortcuts. Daniel Kahneman finds that people time-sample their experiences and encode an event according to how they feel at it's peak and at its end. The so-called peak-end rule governs and tilts it toward emotionally intense events. How happy we are with our lives is a judgment we make based not on actual experiences but on time-sampled remembered experience.”

I would like to add, this is critical in understanding your triggers and coping mechanism. Experiences as very young children are recorded similarly. The reaction is recorded on the old brain and the event is forgotten. Cognitive ability to understand adult behaviors is not yet available to young children. This ability develops as we grow. This is why you may overreact or realize your reaction is much bigger than the situation demands. That is your old brain driving you. Stay conscious of these reactions because these are your triggers. Tell yourself “that was about then and not now.”

School Has Started!

Wed, 14 Sep 2016 04:50:17 GMT

School has started and teacher conferences are coming soon. If your child is having some difficulty I can help you with parenting issues communicating with your child or the school. I also can help your child with communication skills and feelings regarding the school experience. Or, I can work with parents and children. I know this can be a difficult time. I've been there. No one likes to hear negative things about their child. And sometimes we don't hear what teachers are saying because our defenses go up. Teachers may not intend to sound critical. Please contact me for some encouragement and new skills. Happy families make successful kids.

Senior Expo!

Wed, 14 Sep 2016 04:49:03 GMT

I will be participating in a Senior Expo on September 28, 2016. The event is hosted by The Leader newspaper. It is from 9 AM - 1:PM at SPJST Lodge 88 (15th St. & Beall). The Expo is FREE! And, there will be food & drink.

Along with many issues, they have invited professionals in health, finance, and legal issues. MENTAL HEALTH is a big part of all of these issues. Aging can bring on fear, depression, and doubt. Baby Boomers are not OLD. We have lived very differently than our parents. We are generally healthier because of progress in the medical field and information about how to take care of our bodies. TAKING CARE OF OUR MINDS and SPIRIT contribute to all aspects of health. Learning how to communicate effectively with partners, adult children, medical professionals, and all the institutions we encounter is critical. Being in a relationship for many years can be challenging. We face many challenges as we grow. Face them with you best effort. Hope to see you at my table at the Expo.

Communicating

Mon, 11 Jul 2016 04:47:06 GMT

I often remind couples to speak to each other as adults. This avoids defensive reactions. Even if we approach our partners as in a nurturing way we can sound like we are coming from a parenting role. Whether we speak as Nurturing Parent or a Critical Parent our partner is likely to respond from a Child prospective. That is not to say your partner is a Child, our parenting tone triggers a Child tone. No adult likes to feel like a Child. Children feel helpless, controlled, abandoned, and weak among 100s of other emotions. No one wants to be a parent to their partner or be parented by their partner. The best approach for communication is Adult to Adult. I recommend starting your comments with "I" and avoiding using "you" as much as possible. This can be a difficult adjustment because most of us did not witness this model. If you can do it 1 out of 10 times you are way ahead of the game. But, aim higher ( ;